Only Connect - Round One - Heat 8

The Accountants v. The Cinephiles

Yeah, I’m sorry about that. About not posting until Wednesday that is. Oh, I know you’re too forgiving to demand an excuse, but that’s alright, you can have one. I’m playing in the Bridgend Quiz League on Monday evenings – not going badly at all, thanks for asking, 3 from 3 – so even if I do watch OC and UC when I come in from the match, it’s late, and it’s just a watch for pleasure, rather than taking notes for the report. Then yesterday I think I was a little bit under the weather, since I came home from work absolutely cream crackered, aching in all my joints, and I ended up going to bed as soon as I’d done my marking. The extra sleep must have done me good though, since I’ve been a bit bright eyed and bushy tailed today. So without further ado, here’s the show.

I didn’t know any of the first of Monday’s teams, the Accountants. Itzhak Matthai, Drew Firth and their captain Thomas Gough are all accountants, hence the name. Now, as for their opponents, the Cinephiles, well, I didn’t know Howard Kelly, and I didn’t know Tim Catlin. Their skipper, however , I do know, none other than my friend and successor as Mastermind champion, Nancy Dickmann. I may be wrong, but I think that Nancy might just be the first person to represent two different teams in OC , having been a member of the team of Mastermind champs who took on the Crossworders last year. So immediately the Cinephiles were identified as a team to watch. “No problem picking a winner today, “ I said to my daughter Jess, “ The Cinephiles. “ But was I scuppering their chances ?

Round One – What’s the Connection ?

The CInephiles kicked off with Twisted Flax. The first clue was Ladybird Yellow, and I did wonder about books along with the Cinephiles. The second clue was Cockroach colourless. I think that they were getting an inkling by this point, but took the next to be certain. Which all proved the value of waiting and seeing when you’re not 100% certain, since the next made it a lot cleare – Spock green. The colour of their blood . Easier with the third clue certainly. That was a lesson which seemed somewhat lost on the Accountants. They found pictures behind Lion, and didn’t recognize the first. They knew that the second was a sort of spoon, and that the third was a melon baller. So they dived in with the answer that all of these were implements with the name of a fruit. Not close enough I’m afraid. The Cinephiles were given a garlic press, and this didn’t help. The first implement was a lobster pick, and had the Accountants taken the garlic press, then they might well have got the answer that these were simply utensils named after the food item they are used on. A terrific Viper set came next for the Cinephiles. Touched by death – Electrocuted by a hospital generator – and squashed under a ton of underpants had me scratching my head, but they had a lightbulb moment, and gave the required answer – that these were all among the many ways that Kenny has been killed on South Park. I had the next on two clues. The Accountants picked Two Reeds, and found Academic Bookseller Established 1751 – Tadcaster Brewer. “John Smith !” I shouted. “Sam Smith. “ offered the Acocuntants. Oh, right idea but wrong brewer, as was confirmed by the next two clues – Saved by Pocahontas – and – Labour Party Leader . The Cines missed a trick just offering Smith, which Victoria was in no mood to allow tonight. I had the next which was a music set behind eye of Horus, albeit that I needed all 4 clues. I didn’t know the first two. The third is a very famous piece of circus music. The last, though, was the theme of the TV show Gladiators. Cue lightbulb moment – since at the back of my mind I remembered that the circus music is actually called something like Entry of the Gladiators. The mind boggles at real gladiators entering the Colosseum to the strains of dum dum diddle – idle – um dum dum dum, but there we are. Neither team had it.I really like dthe last set which the Accountants found behind Water. Subjection to their owl husbands – Printers have persecuted me – Go and sin on more – were the first three. If you didn’t know it you could possibly have guessed it from the third – although the Accountants couldn’t. The last one though is more well known – Thou shalt commit adultery. As the Cines were happy to confirm for a bonus, these are all misprints that have appeared in different versions of the Bible. The Cinephiles, then, led into the second round with 5 points to 0.

Round Two – What’s the Connection ?

It’s been a good couple of weeks since I’ve been even close to a 5 pointer. But when the Cines picked Twisted Flax they revealed a picture of the Brooklyn Bridge. Cue lightbulb and a shout of Harper Seven ! from the Clark sofa. The Cines probably had it too, but took the next one, a picture of a production of Romeo and Juliet, to be certain. Children of the Beckhams. I believe that Mr. Beckham is an association footballer, and Mrs. Beckham is a former member of a popular close harmony singing group. The Accountants , desperate for points, had a stab at eye of Horus. 3 = Edinburgh , 4 = Glasgow , 5 = Liverpool were revealed. They had a bash with 6 = Manchester, which was correct. I knew that they were wrong to say that they thought it was population size, but it didn’t matter. It was the correct answer, but it was to do with dialling codes – Edinburgh 0131 etc. etc. Didn’t matter, they all count whether you know the reason for what comes next or not. The Cines took a relatively benign James – Louise – Eugenie. Actually I say benign, but it only really becomes obvious that these are grandchildren of the Queen ( Gawd Bless ‘ Er ) in ascending order of age when Eugenie is revealed. Beatrice being the next. I’m afraid that the Two Reeds set which was revealed by the Accountants was certainly gettable, but they didn’t know it. Scarlet – Four and Baskervilles were revealed, and they knew that these were Sherlock Holmes novels. But they didn’t know that the 4th and last full length novel was The Valley Of Fear . ( An interesting book, but a Sherlock Holmes novel – well, blink and you’d miss him ! ) The Cines were in no mood to extend mercy, and took the bonus. I was pleased with myself for getting the next off two. Lion gave the Cines – 0400 morning – 0800 forenoon – 1200 afternoon. Four hour spans gave it to me . These are watches on board ship. The Cines offered what I would have done – 16:00 – Dog Watch – and these were indeed watches at sea. Strictly speaking the answer was apparently 16:00 First dog – but Victoria accepted it. To end the round the Accountants took the lion, and found Extrait – Eau de Parfum – Eau de Toilette. Maddeningly , for the second time in a row they had the connection, but not the right answer. They knew that these were increasing ( or was it decreasing ) strengths of perfume, but didn’t get eau de cologne – which for the armchair player was possibly the most obvious answer. Once again the Cines swooped in to take the point. The Accountants, then , had at least opened their score in what many6 teams find to be the hardest round, scoring 2, but the Cines were way ahead with 14.

Round Three – The Connecting Walls

The Accoutnants took Water ( no pun intended ) and managed to entangle a set of towns in Cumbria – Egremont – Kendal – Millom and Cockermouth. That was it, though. They didn’t untangle any of the other lines, and even when they were untangled I’m afraid they couldn’t spot the connections. Shot – Gothic – Vole and Robber can apparently all be preceded by bank. Tough, tough line. Bank vole ? Never heard of it. Not sure that bank gothic or bank shot would have occurred to me either. That’s the luck of the draw, and it never rains but it pours. Cist – Vault – Barrow and Mastaba were all places where people might be buried. They might have got it from vault and barrow – and I knew mastaba as well. Cist is a new one on me. Holiday – Fraozen – True Blue and Borderline – well I though that the team all looked young enough/ old enough ( delete where applicable ) to recognise songs by Madonna, but they didn’t. Who knows whether this round was brought on as a reaction to their struggles in the previous two rounds, but the fact was that this really wasn’t a great wall performance.

The Cines probably had a slightly gentler wall, but it still wasn’t easy. They did well to unravel the whole wall, and score a maximum. They knew that Maidenhead – Windsor – Marlow and Abingdon are all on the Thames. Good shout that – because I was working on Berks, being perplexed because I knew that Abingdon is in Oxfordshire, and Marlow in Bucks. 3D – Field – Opera and Reading they knew could precede glasses. Marsh – slough – quagmire and Morass they knew as words for bogs , which left Brian , Stewie – Cleveland and Meg, who are all characters from Family Guy. With the scores at 24 – 4 it was practically impossible that the Accountants could win, even if the Cines didn’t score another point. Full houses on 5 sets of vowels could only bring them a draw.

Fourth Round

Of course, the Cines did score more points. The first set , on comedians born in Wales , fell to them 3 – 1. Tommy Cooper I felt sure would feature – they’re really proud of him in Caerphilly – but no. The Accountants put on a good show with analgesics taking these 3 – 1. Unfortunately they lost a hard earned point on famous golf courses, and the Cines took 3 of them. The Accountants took their last point on cat breeds, and the Cines were happy to add another three. They won by a resounding 33 – 8. I feel a little sorry for the Accountants. I think that by leaping in too quickly on the first round they scuppered their chances of getting into double figures. But it must be said that on the evidence of what we saw, they couldn’t really challenge a team like the Cines. As for the Cines, well, Nancy , I certainly have no intention of scuppering your chances by predicting a win in the whole series. But every other team would do well to take you very , very seriously . Best of luck in the next round.